Britney Spears posted a lengthy message to fans on Instagram June 24 following her conservatorship testimony, in which she told a judge she’d like out from under the legal arrangement she’s been in for the past 13 years. (Under Spears’s current conservatorship, she has no legal control over her life and finances.)
During the hearing, Spears told the judge, “I’ve lied and told the whole world, ‘I’m okay and I’m happy.’ It’s a lie. I thought I just, maybe if I said that enough, maybe I might become happy, because I’ve been in denial. I’ve been in shock. I am traumatized. You know, ‘fake it till you make it.’ But now I’m telling you the truth, okay? I’m not happy. I can’t sleep. I’m so angry, it’s insane. And I’m depressed. I cry every day.”
The pop icon expanded on this in her IG post, explaining why there’s been a disconnect between her online presence and what she said in court. “I believe as people we all want the fairy tale life and by the way I’ve posted … my life seems to look and be pretty amazing … I think that’s what we all strive for !!!! That was one of my mother’s best traits … no matter how shitty a day was when I was younger … for the sake of me and my siblings she always pretended like everything was ok,” she wrote.
Spears continued, “I’m bringing this to peoples attention because I don’t want people to think my life is perfect because IT’S DEFINITELY NOT AT ALL … and if you have read anything about me in the news this week 📰 … you obviously really know now it’s not !!!! I apologize for pretending like I’ve been ok the past two years … I did it because of my pride and I was embarrassed to share what happened to me … but honestly who doesn’t want to capture their Instagram in a fun light 💡🤷🏼♀️ !!!! Believe it or not pretending that I’m ok has actually helped … so I decided to post this quote today because by golly if you’re going through hell … I feel like Instagram has helped me have a cool outlet to share my presence … existence … and to simply feel like I matter despite what I was going through and hey it worked.”
For a complete breakdown of Britney Spears’s conservatorship situation, click here.