Chrissy Teigen Says Her Pregnancy Loss Was ‘Transformative’: ‘In a Way, It Saved Me’

After four months, Chrissy Teigen is reflecting on how her devastating pregnancy loss “transformed” her.

Back in September, Teigen and John Legend announced the loss of their third child, baby Jack, due to pregnancy complications by sharing raw, heartbreaking photos from the hospital room. “Looking at those pictures now, it seems like so long ago,” the Cravings author told Ellen DeGeneres during her talk show appearance on February 8. “Of course, everything was such a blur. Even thinking back to it now, I am still in therapy about it, and I’m still coming to terms with it.”

Even months later, Tegen said, there are “constant reminders” that make it difficult to move on. “I have maternity clothes, and there are things that I bought for my eighth month and my ninth month,” the star continues. “So it’s just hard because he would’ve been born this week, so you look at those things and you have these constant reminders.”

Still, Teigen told the host, she feels she’s become a “much better person now.”

“Being Thai and being raised in a house that was very open about loss, I think it was really helpful because I see it as—it can be a beautiful thing. It was a really transformative thing for me, and in a way, it really saved me, because I don’t think that I would’ve discovered therapy and then sobriety and this path of feeling good about myself and feeling like a new person.”

Chrissy Teigen told Ellen DeGeneres she never expected something this “unimaginable” would happen to her. “And then you think about all the people that go through it in silence and you get really sad for them,” she said. “Ours was so public; so, so many people were so supportive. You really gain this incredible amount of empathy. And I really, somehow, think I’m a better person now. And I just have the best support system ever.”

You can watch the full interview, below.