Maude’s Cone Helped Me Get Over My Fear of Anal Play

Let me start by saying that I’m an anal virgin—or, if a butt plug can take your virginity, I at least was until very recently. I first tried exploring anal stimulation with my finger back in college, after a campus sexuality workshop touted the joys of the anus, but felt nothing close to pleasure, so I gave up. A few years later I got a butt plug but just couldn’t seem to get it up there. To be honest, the whole concept of having something in my butt freaked me out.

So, when I first received the Cone—the very first butt plug created by sexual wellness brand Maude—I was skeptical that it would fit inside me, let alone do anything for me. I was pleasantly surprised, though, that I succeeded in the former and even got some of the latter.

Maude’s brand is all about simplicity, and this product is no exception. The Maude Cone doesn’t vibrate like many other butt plugs do—it’s just 4.25 inches of platinum-grade, soft-touch silicone (3.5 of those inches are insertable, and the width is 1.5 inches), with a tapered shape for easy insertion and a flared base so it can’t get stuck in you. The toy is phthalate- and latex-free for those concerned about chemicals—and waterproof for those who want to use it in the shower or bath. It’s intentionally slim for anal beginners like yours truly, and it costs only $30, so if it’s not your thing, it’s not a huge investment. 

Another thing Maude likes to do is create sleek, elegant products that look good on your nightstand. I happened to leave the Cone on my bathroom counter and I did feel strangely comfortable with it there: The green silicone (it also comes in charcoal), petite size, and thin shape make it look more like a tiny, dim lava lamp than a sex toy. (It also comes with a nice canvas bag for storage and travel.) But I eventually had to work up the courage to bring it into bed with me. 

To maximize my chances of being able to actually get it inside me, I played with my clit for a while first. Then came the moment of truth. The whole thing didn’t slide right in immediately, but with excessive-seeming amounts of water-based lube—you shouldn’t use Cone with oil or silicone lube as it will apparently degrade the silicone—and gradual movement, I was surprised that it went in with little discomfort. And once I got the insertion itself out of the way, it stayed snuggly in there thanks to its flared base, which also happens to have a suction cup so adventurous users can attach it to the floor or wall. Getting it in was the hardest part; the rest was a breeze.

I used a vibrator on my clit while the Cone was inside my anus, and when I climaxed, I could feel my anal muscles contracting along with my vagina—sort of like a full-pelvis orgasm. The anal muscles are actually always engaged during orgasm, but feeling them contract against something intensified the pleasure and made the whole sensation more spread out. 

I also tried a few experiments: Even though the Maude Cone doesn’t vibrate, I was able to make it vibrate by holding my vibrator against the base, which created a pleasant buzzing sensation in my anus. I also tried penetrating my vagina with a dildo while the Cone was in me, but it felt like too much—there just wasn’t enough space for them both. When I was ready to call it a night, the plug came out of me fairly effortlessly when I pushed my pelvic muscles outward. 

All in all, while having something up my butt while I masturbated was kind of an odd feeling, it was also a new and interesting one. Is anal pleasure suddenly my thing now? No. But having finally succeeded in using an anal toy, I do feel like I’ve reached a sexual milestone. Anal play no longer intimidates me so much, and even though I don’t know if I’ll want to explore it further, it feels liberating to know that I can. Thanks, Cone!